Love=War

Over and over, over and over
I fall for you
Over and over, over and over
I try not to
Over and over, over and over
You make me fall for you
Over and over, over and over
You don’t even try

Another chorus to a song. I love the meaning behind them. Oh so true. I’m hoping things work out for you. You seem to be doing alright. Keep on going babe. 

 

I told myself I won’t miss you, but I remember

What it feels like beside you

I really miss your hair in my face

and the way your innocense tastes

And I think you should know this

You deserve much better then me

That’s the chorus to the song. I love that song. Makes me think of you. Makes me cry. It even made me cry when we were together. I still love you, always will. I won’t ever be mad at what happened, not at you at least. You taught me alot. I didn’t think I could fall this hard, and this deep ever again. I want you back. Not sure if you know this, or sense this but I do. More then anything. I made c ommitment today, that is damn hard to keep. I told myself I’d only talk to you every other day, unless you start the conversation. Well seeing that you had a bad day. Made me want to so bad, but I am stronger then I thought and I didn’t. You need your space. I know this. I’ll always be here for you though, forever and ever.

Heres a little taste of my creative side, so read and enjoy

When I am with you,
I never feel blue,
my feelings for you grow
day by day to cloud nine i flew

Your a treasure of gold,
I Cherish what we have,
I hope this feeling never gets old,
With you I feel that once again I can laugh

You bring a joy to my heart,
I havent felt before,
We are off to a great Start,
I feel for you more and more

Whenever we part,
know theres a special place for you,
in my heart

I stand by,
all the way
know I will do my best,
to help you through your day

How do you like them apples!!!

and yes i can be creative and sweet too.
sincerely,

Whenever I thought there was any doubt in our love. I just read this. It always made me smile. Now it just makes me cry

I can’t quite understand how you are too selfish and independent to no
longer see me and my kids. No one has a perfect life. No one was
raised perfect. I sure don’t expect my kids to be raised perfect. I
wasn’t. You weren’t. No one was. All my kids would need from you would
be a little attention and acknowledgement. They already have a mom and
she’s really good with them. I know you are a thinker, an over
thinker. I am not expecting you to be a role model, for my kids. I can
try and do that. If my kids do happen to look up you so be it. I fail
to see what is so terrible about that. You are a great and wonderful
person Kim. Maybe you’re afraid to admit that.

Thing were going great. Its funny how life works out. My kids kept me in a marriage which eventually failed. Now they have driven a love out of my life. I don’t regret having them. There isn’t a day in my life that goes by that a even think of such a thing. I love my kids. No one will ever come between me and them, ever. I don’t know what was with this girl. She seemed very confused. I know she can handle the kids. She’s great with kids. Maybe she doesn’t want to settle down and take responsibilities ever. She does live pretty care free. Not even part time responsibilities. That’s all my kids are. And I don’t expect anything of her with them, except to like them and put up with them for the few days that I have them. Things between me and her never even got to that stage. She saw them for maybe 15 mins last weekend. Guess that was enough to put the fear in her. What’s making this the most difficult is our goodbye yesterday. It was anything like I’ve ever expereinced before. After she told me, we went out for dinner, which was hard but it worked. Then back to her place to get my things, I had packed as I figured I had 4 days off with her. We sat and looked at each other, she even took my sunglasses off so she could stare directly into my eyes. Sadness would’ve been all she saw. We held hands, looked into each others eyes, I don’t even remember what words were said. I remember a few, she said she wanted to kiss me, so we kissed. Then more words wee said, I said I didn’t want to go. We kissed again. We might have even kissed another time. Then she said she didn’t want to see me go. She got up, went to her room, but before, I called her back. She stopped. I approached her and we had a vey passionate goodbye kiss. Then we held each other, and sobbed. On the ride back home I texted her that I forgot to mention I love you, and that I could never be mad at you, and that your not selfish. I hope this isn’t goodbye. This girl was amasing. I am hoping we can still be friends, but I’m not even sure if I can handle that. This girl completely changed the way I looked at life. For the better. Taught me how to live and have fun again. I guess responsibilities suck.

I miss the way you look at me
I miss the way you say teehee
I miss your voice and your smile
I miss our talks that last awhile
I miss the way you climb over me
I miss you alot and now you’ll see
I miss how you spring roll the sheets
I miss you from hairs to feets
I miss how good you smell
I miss you alot, well well
I miss your brown eyes
I miss your A &W ties
I miss you and this will show
I miss you and now you will know

I think about you day and night

 

I thought about you a lot tonight

 

I think about you all day long

 

I thought about you, till the night was gone

 

I think about you all weekends past

 

I thought about how months have passed

 

You are always on my mind

 

You are in my thoughts through out the end time

 

A new love means a new song that brings tears. This song, Broken by Seether, brings the most. I sing it when I hear it play. I can only mutter the first line without crying.

I wanted you to know I love the way you laugh
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away
I keep your photograph, I know it serves me well
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain

‘Cause I’m broken when I’m open
And I don’t feel like I am strong enough
‘Cause I’m broken when I’m lonesome
And I don’t feel right when you’re gone away

The worst is over now and we can breathe again
I wanna hold you high, you steal my pain away
There’s so much left to learn, and no one left to fight
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain

[x2]
‘Cause I’m broken when I’m open
And I don’t feel like I am strong enough
‘Cause I’m broken when I’m lonesome
And I don’t feel right when you’re gone away

I sit and wait for the phone to ring

 

Remembering all the great things

 

When I hear it ring my heart flutters

 

Your words I see melt me like butter

 

I miss you more then you will ever know

 

I miss you Kim as the tears flow

 

I sit and cry as I wait for you

 

I sit and cry as song word float by

 

Then we talk again

 

My heart flutters there is no pain

 

I feel alive I feel so great

 

If only there was a different fate

 

My love for you there is nothing higher

 

For you I hope until my eyes perspire

 

Back to the back burner. That’s probably one of the worst places to be. Especially if you know your there. So many questions lingering through my head. Wait? Don’t wait. If she does come around tell her that’s nice, had yor chance. Can I wait around for you? If I do wait and it happens is it going to just happen again? This is quite the perplexing situation. Good thing I am busy for at least 2 more days. Though it sure would be nice if she’d call me. I talked to her online thrusday night and WOW I was floating. Felt amasing. Felt energized. Felt. WOW. Though the following afternoon I wa listening to music and I was crying. Crying over another girl. Such is the way of Mr. Nice Guy.